* You've never met any celebrities.
* Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
* "Vacation" means driving through Hocking Hills or going to King's Island.
* You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular.
* You measure distance in minutes.
* Down south to you means Kentucky.
* You know several people who have hit a deer.
* Your school classes were canceled because of cold.
* Your school classes were canceled because of heat.
* You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way.
* You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
* You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."
* You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July.
* Stores don't have bags; they have sacks.
* You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.
* You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it no matter what time of the year.
* You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition. Example:"Where's my coat at?" or "If you go to the mall I wanna go with."
* All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, or grain.
* You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
* You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer, and Jell-O salad with marshmallows.
* You carry jumper cables in your car.
* You know what "cow tipping" or "Possum Kicking" is.
* You only own 3 spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.
* You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
* Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
* You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
* You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie.
* The local paper covers national and international headlines on one page but requires six pages for sports.
* You think that deer season is a national holiday.
* You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
* You find -20 degrees F "a little chilly".
* You know all 4 seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Still Winter, and Construction.
* You know what a real buckeye is, and have a recipe for candy ones.
* You know if another Ohioian is from southern, middle or northern Ohio as soon as they open their mouth.
* You can spell words like Cuyahoga and Tuscarawas.
* You know that Serpent Mound was not made by snakes.
* You actually get these jokes and forward them to all your Ohio friends.
* Isn't it sad? You just said "yup" and "uh-huh" or "ain't that the truth" to most of these!!!