Dr. Strangelove


One of the funniest movie episodes of all time, IMHO: in "Dr. Strangelove," the American army has attacked a U.S. Air Force base because the demented commander sent bombers to Russia on his own authority, without provocation. After the commander's suicide, Peter Sellers, playing Group Commander Mandrake (!), a loopy British officer attached to the base, has figured out the secret code and wants to call the White House so the squadron can be called back. Unfortunately, because of the attack, the phones are out of order. But Mandrake finds a pay phone that is still working. At that moment, Col. "Bat" Guano of the U.S. Army bursts in. The dialog goes something like this:

"Bat" Guano: Awright, fella, hands up! Who are YOU?

Mandrake: [saluting smartly] Group Commander Mandrake, SIR! and you are... Col. "Bat" GUANO?!?

"Bat" Guano: That's right. What are you doing here?

Mandrake: I'm attached... but never mind, Colonel! I have the means to call back the squadron! I know the secret code! All the telephones are down, but there's a pay phone over there that's working. Do you happen to have any spare change?

"Bat" Guano: I never carry change into combat. How do I know you're telling the truth? Stand back, there!

Mandrake: You've got to believe me. The fate of the whole world is at stake. Look! over there. A Coke machine. Take your carbine and shoot off the lock to the change box.

"Bat" Guano: What? That's private property!

Mandrake: Colonel... Guano, the fate of the whole world is at stake. Please. Do as I say.

"Bat" Guano: [doubtfully] Well, OK. But listen to me, Mandrake. If you're not telling the truth -- you'll answer to the Coca Cola company for this!